Duane Digs a Hole

Duane wanted to do something outdoors, maybe get the kids involved, so he started a harmless hobby in his backyard. It turned out kids all over town loved it. But when Duane started getting visits from Vietnam War era Hmong refuges, Chicago mobsters, the TSA, world famous lawyers and actresses, not to mention the President of the United States, Duane and the Lutherans of the bucolic suburb of Lake Elmo Minnesota, found their peaceful little world disrupted, to say the least.Digging a hole in your back yard might seem odd to others, but to Duane it sounded like fun. As a kid he loved building forts and exploring caves. What he had in mind was something outdoors and physical; he could get the kids away from their cell phones and the Internet. He had it all thought out, like a mini-engineering project; how big to make it, how to prevent cave-ins, ladders, shoring it up. He’d even thought about lights and an electric hoist if it got deep enough. There were a few things he hadn’t considered, like what to do with all the dirt, and how his neighbors would react, including every kid within miles. And those turned out to be the least of his problems.When Mafia dons, U.S. Senators, the TSA, Hmong refugees, the international media, and the President of the United States, all take an interest in your hole-digging hobby, with some wanting you to keep digging, some wanting you to stop, and some actually thinking of joining you, you have a problem. World changing events and international incidents were not on Duane’s agenda, but being Duane, and a stanch believer in individual liberty, he probably would have done it anyway.Why on earth are so many interested in his little project? How can Duane get them to leave him alone? Is there something hidden at the bottom of the hole? Will Lake Elmo, or the whole world for that matter, ever be the same?