The Vain Elephant Girl and Other Stories

A selection of short stories. Humour, thriller, surrealism, true tales, crazyness and a pinch of eros.

Thin rings of smoke rise like a spiral staircase from the cigar of Evaristo, who dangles on a branch pretending to read his magazine Colourful Quills Flying High.
There are some days that Evaristo is tormented by visions of the curved shapes of Ariosta, which have delighted and shocked the young adventurous parrot and left him absorbed, bound in murky delights and fantasies.
The first yellow and green orchid came to rest on the water, without being noticed, between the feet of the vain elephant Ariosta. Sitting in the shallow water of the shore, Ariosta continued to rub her skin with a smooth stone.
My God, what wrinkled skin I have this morning, thought the elephant, it must be the humidity of the lake. The second black and red orchid spiralled around the trunk of Ariosta and bobbed up and down, barely noticeable, next to the first orchid. Maybe it would improve if I take a mud bath. This smooth stone is useless, she thought again.
The third white and blue orchid floated in a respectful loop in the air and came to rest between the first two, always between the feet of Ariosta. The elephant arched her eyebrows, feigning indifference. She began to roll her big eyes, but forced herself not to turn around. Now that she thought about it, for a few minutes she had noticed what felt like a rustle, a current of air above her head. No one was ever allowed to spy on her while she was in the bathroom, yet someone was spying. Who dared? Behind Ariosta, two little eyes, daring and fearful at the same time, continued to admire her from a well-hidden spot among the branches near the shore. Below those eyes, the bold and proud parrot Evaristo’s beak munched peanuts and muttered words of admiration for the beautiful shapes of the elephant, quite unlike those other flibbertigibbets, all painted feathers and scrawny bones. Finally, a satisfied Evaristo set off in flight and began to swoop and glide in front of Ariosta.
“My dear, I hope you liked my sweet floral tribute, or perhaps you would prefer a small bunch of fresh shoots?“ (The Vain Elephant Girl)

“CItizen Sylvie, I presume. Good morning, citizen, I accepted the invitation of your gardener. Let me introduce myself. I am Jean Maifrot, gunpowder trader, supplier of the Revolution and also the Army of France.”
“I'm Countess de la Noir. How are you, citizen?”
Countess! The forbidden word, whispered by the malicious Sylvie, excites the good merchant.
“You're charming, citizen. I am looking forward to admiring your hidden beauty.”
“Do not be so impatient, my dear citizen Maifrot. Please admire for the last time my plants in the garden.”
“Unfortunately, I do not have much time to spend at this charming garden. The sun, the green of the parsley, the red of the tomatoes, a true joy to behold. You're a lucky woman to live here.”
“All credit goes to Gaspar, the gardener. He knows the secrets.”
“Tell me, citizen Sylvie, do you receive many men?”
“Oh, certainly not. I am very exclusive and private. Only a few visits. I would have no space for more. I mean my discretion would not allow it. For me it is like a passion which I need to satisfy from time to time.”
“I consider myself a lucky man.”
“Of course you are. Now are you getting impatient?
“Here's the money, twenty thousand francs.”
“I am ready to show you what you wanted, remember the warning: look but do not touch. Let's go upstairs to my studio. Please follow me.”
In her studio Sylvie, turns her back to Maifrot, raises her skirt, slowly lowers her panties to her knees. The tradesman is thrilled at the sight of the dreamy derriere. Sylvie bends over and places her hands on a small inlaid desk.
“Please, Maifrot, turnover the hourglass on the table in front of you. You have just one minute hourglass. Look but do not touch.”
“Citizen Sylvie, I would pay any amount to caress your superb ass.” (The Garden)