I was a Russian spy at the ripe age of thirteen, given my uncanny ability to tell if someone was lying (I also read fortunes on the weekends). By sixteen, I had become too much of a handful for the Lethal Intelligence Ensemble (LIE). I was quickly exiled to the South of France, where I worked with wayward elephants in the Circus of Roaming Animals and People (CRAP). I was able to make ends meet by selling my organs on the black market for pocket change and beer money. At the age of twenty-three, I decided to expand my horizons and become a blackjack dealer in Ireland. I loved the family atmosphere at Barney’s Underground Liquor Lounge (BULL). People couldn’t resist the allure of liquor up front and poker in the rear. Eventually, I became tired of the rear and headed off to the United States to try my hand at tall tales. That is what brings us here today. If you have a moment, I’d like to tell you a story. (This bio is not to be taken seriously under any circumstances.) The New York Times and USA Today best-selling author of the White Trash Trilogy, The Note, Perfect Lie, Pretty Little Things, the Honor series, Safe Word, Rellik, The Good Girls and Crave. www.TeresaMummert.com