That’s Not a Girl, That’s a Vampire is a novelette about a few transformative days in the life of a bisexual vampire.
Holly, sixty and feeling it, hangs out in sleazy nightclubs she despises so she can anonymously pick up men and women. She renders them unconscious with drugs so she can secretly steal a pint of their blood without having to kill for it.
She is set up on a blind date that goes surprisingly well and decides she wants to have a proper relationship. She attempts to find a new way to feed without having to work the nightclubs.