What Doesn’t Kill Me Makes Me Weirder and Harder to Relate to: A Memoir

An iconic rock DJ of the Twin Cities tells her harrowing story of being stalked while living her very public life

What’s it like to be in the public spotlight when it just might get you killed? For Mary Lucia, becoming a wildly popular rock DJ meant connecting with a multitude of fans through a shared love of music and deep cuts. But for one listener, that connection became a dangerous obsession, catapulting Lucia into the terrifying three-year nightmare that she chronicles in this raw, wry, and profoundly courageous memoir. With electrifying wit and anger, Lucia shares her experience of navigating constant terror while life absurdly goes on: interview rock stars, curate a radio show song list, judge high school battles of the band, kick a drug addiction cold turkey . . . all while fearing what might be waiting in her mailbox or who might be waiting on her front step or at her back door.

Lucia was no stranger to inappropriate or weird contact from fans, but things turned sinister when ten pounds of raw meat were delivered to her at work, followed by a steady stream of ominous letters, cards, packages, and messages. When the letters included threats to her dogs’ safety, she tried to get help, but without a name and return address on these communications there was nothing she could do. As the stalker’s actions escalated, Lucia felt more and more isolated. Police responding to her 911 calls were insensitive and dismissive, and even her friends implied that being stalked was just a hazard of her high-profile job and her high-energy personality. No one seemed to take seriously the danger she faced.

Inseparable from this ordeal is the story of how Mary Lucia became the notorious radio malcontent known by so many avid listeners. From the good, bad, and weird of growing up in her eccentric family to drugs, death, and dogs, Lucia finally shares her life on her own terms in What Doesn’t Kill Me Makes Me Weirder and Harder to Relate To. Applying her signature dark humor to her own traumatic experiences, Lucia’s memoir is idiosyncratic, bold, and--ironically--relatable.

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Mary Lucia is a media broadcast personality, writer, actor, and voiceover artist. She worked at The Current from 2005 to 2022 and was well known for her unconventional style and expansive music knowledge. She hosted the local music show Popular Creeps, twice a Minnesota Music Award winner for Best Locally Produced Show, and she was voted best FM radio personality by City Pages seven times. She is currently the program advisor at the University of Minnesota’s Radio K.