The Beast Within

Hi my name is Debs Goddard and I have been painting and illustrating for over 30 years now. I have always wanted to write but never had the confidence until 12 years ago when I was too unwell to do much else but be stuck in bed. As a result I began giving it a go. My first novel took 2 1/2 years to write and ended up 1200 pages or 350,000 words. ’The Charnel Throne’ was my first novel and is still my baby; I am very fond of the story. I decided to stick to fantasy stories, or gothic type stories to give me a break from the pain in my reality. I was diagnosed with breast cancer on my 23rd birthday and given 4 months to live. I tend to think my life is something of a miracle because I had a spontaneous remission from the very last stage of cancer. With a wonderful helpful and giving hubby at my side, we had a beautiful daughter and a cherubic son at that time. But the next eight years were ones of seizures, severe pain and many trips to the hospital with intrusive tests and surgery and more tests and more surgery. Until, after another beautiful daughter, I was diagnosed with bowel cancer on my 39th birthday. This time I was given six months to live. I had 15 operations in the following 10 years and they finally managed to stop my body trying to kill me as it kept cutting of my blood circulation. It was a truly terrifying time. Around 7 years now, I began to walk again, gaining my strength and my fitness back slowly and loving that I can walk again, even though I get very tired very easily. As a result of all my surgery and my cancer, I am and have been in unrelenting acute pain 24 hrs a day, (for 32 years now this birthday), topped up by a handful of pills twice daily. The pills help me move and think without concentrating on myself all the time. People get very self-absorbed when pain is all they can feel and I was no exception, but after the first five years I did learn to keep a sense of humour and be a happy sick lady. I began to do much more and got into my writing and painting again. I have the best hubby in the world who has carried us through the hard times, giving of himself over and over again. I have three beautiful children and I have one truly special granddaughter and two grandchildren I still don’t know. I love to write and paint and I truly hope you enjoy my work.