the longest war: a psychotherapist’s experience of divorce and power

As a naive freshman, Catherine meets Walter, a senior and Big Man on Campus whose sophistication, confidence, and wealth both intimidate and excite her. A three-year absentee courtship follows, during which time the idea of Walt tethers Catherine to safety. She was programmed to marry someone like him, so she ignores the warning signs that they might not be a good match. Hoping to please her mother and seeking refuge from her fraught childhood, she marries and has children with him--but the marriage doesn’t last.

Once divorced, Catherine finds herself in a war with Walt over money, and then over access to her children--and suddenly, she can no longer ignore her childhood trauma. The high stakes of her battle with her ex-husband forge her like steel, finding every vulnerability where she needs to heal. Gradually, she develops a backbone, relinquishes her trauma-induced, people-pleasing ways, and steps into her own power.

Honest and unflinching, The Longest War reminds us that there’s always a way through when we access the courage within ourselves. No matter how painful life’s difficulties, they offer us the opportunity to heal ourselves and evolve into more open, loving, compassionate people. The choice is ours.