tulla thorn

Once upon a time, not so long ago in the land of Suburbia, there were husbands and children whom today's women have swapped for wine bars, internet dating, sleeping around and quickie divorces. 

Best friends, Fern and Stacy, finally get to be bridesmaids to their wealthy friend Helena.  Extravagant wedding of the year certainly has an abundance of pomp and mystifying circumstance.  

Stacy: innocent, straitlaced and downright clumsy divorcee (with cat) and an unrealistic Great Expectation List which men must measure up to and the reason she’s still single – love at first sight and all that tripe.  Dating poses multiple agonies: what to wear, and is sex like riding a bike or could she have forgotten (not that she was ever an outstanding cyclist). 

Fern: bubbly, vivacious, risqué - everyman’s wet dream or a bit of a nightmare?  The embodiment of sex-on-legs trashes her way from male to male reaffirming her (imagined) Goddess status while relentlessly pursuing hotel mogul – not in the least interested in her. 

Men are dwindling as fast as hairlines and finances on alimony; the only expanding exception is waistlines. 

Love’s lottery – Internet dating – surely the probability of finding true love must be stacked in favour of ‘Happily Ever After’ compared to life’s other gambles – but a string of disastrous dates proves otherwise.