Erin Spatz

I did not grow up dreaming of being a writer. I never wanted to be anything but someone’s mommy. My dream of motherhood was very idealistic, even though I feel like my own mother did a great job portraying the truth of motherhood.

My belief that motherhood would come easy and be easy lasted all through my first pregnancy. It never occurred to me that once I became pregnant that I had to start making parental choices, even while my baby was still in my uterus. The end of my perfect plan came in the form of Postpartum Panic Disorder and everything changed. The pages that follow are my journal entries from that time in my life. The good, the bad and the crazy!