max longstone

Get ready to journey to Florida; the Golden Coast. The land of never-ending vacations, bikini-clad girls, tall umbrella drinks and the sun... And, for those who are about to land on M.I.A and haven’t packed your Tech-9 don’t worry you’ll get a coupon, and directions to the nearest gun-shop, once you’ve filed through customs; the Orange State is nice like that to tourist. Jump on an airboat ride through the fifth dimension. Pack your dope, meth, ketamine and other essential medicines in tight; you’re going to need them. Always have a glass ready - the drinks have free refills - and, above all, don’t ever take your eyes of the scenery or you might miss our star attractions: Ira the fetish obsessed bowling enthusiast, a giant blitzed-out crocodile, the nymphomaniac model with a heart of gold and a Remington shot-gun, the brit vegan gangster known as:: The Cannibal, Tommy and his amazing mutant ability for finding weed even tied up inside a Tibetan convent, Celestine, her Harley and her bazooka, Blacktip - the Conch Republic’s legend and also a shark serial killer, the dynamic duo of best-friends Lando and Chass - the African-American trooper and the preppy Neo-Nazi skinhead, the dame with the elephant gun and the tequila penchant and, let’s not forget, our interpret hero Daryl; who is about to have Olympic village sex. Hop in and join the fun as we follow them and many more through the Everglades, Miami, the Ten Thousand Islands and Key West. Don’t be afraid, there is plenty of room for everyone and we’ve brought enough booze to ride out the end of the world. You’ll feel the might of Run-run-Riviera - the oddly named F-5 hurricane - as we search for Abe’s killer and try to decipher what’s hidden inside the dying whispers of a deranged multi-billionaire. Vomit bags are supplied, free of charge. P.S: did I mention that Abe’s a decapitated human head inside a furry sex suit?